Any Complaints? | Bella Vista Church of Christ

Any Complaints?

Any Complaints?
Bill E Smith
3/4/98

Any Complaints?



Let me share with you an article I read in a bulletin this week:

        A couple, who constantly bickered, determined to go through a whole week without voicing any criticism of each other. Rather than argue, they agreed that each time either became irritated, they would write it down and place it in a box each prepared for the other. When Saturday night arrived they decided the husband would open his box first. As he began to read the dozens of little notes, his eyes reflected the hurt and disappointment in himself as he read her complaints:

        • You’ve been promising to fix the screen door for months, and it’s still not fixed.
        • You never put your socks in the dirty clothes.
        • You never buy me pretty clothes and jewelry.


        He was sincerely grieved by all the ways he had offended his wife.

        Then it was her turn. She opened the box and pulled out the first slip of paper. She read it with a lump in her throat. Picking up two more notes, she read them quickly and began to weep. Every note in the box read,
        • I love you!
        • I love you!
        • I love you?


As I finished reading the article, I’m sure I felt just as you feel now when you read it. We are ashamed of our petty complaints. Of the thousands of things we like about our mates, and others, we seem to zero in on the few things that irritate us about them. When we see that our complaints hurt those we love, we hate ourselves for our pettiness and cruelty. Why must we be so critical of those whom we appreciate most? Why can’t we express the love that lies so deep, instead of the fleeting irritations? What is gained by our criticism, especially when they hurt the ones we love?

Well, two things I hope I can remember about it all. First, it seems natural to be critical of those we love. Everyone does it! So when we are critical, or criticized, it doesn’t make us, nor our critics, necessarily abnormal. Evidently it is something we all have to cope with, although we certainly don’t want to condone it, or even try to excuse it.

Then, maybe we can all work harder at looking at the positive attributes of those whom we love, and learning to ignore the negative ones. Our loved ones have so many good qualities, and we have often taken them for granted. We can overcome a critical disposition if we work at it. If we desire, we can change any disposition we have. We can save ourselves a lot of regrets if we can learn this lesson soon enough. Maybe we ought to start working on it today!

—Bill E. Smith
Oklahoma City, OK

Written By

Bella Vista Church of Christ

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